lately mostly everything has felt like a massive struggle, watching the people i love fighting against a world that says they don’t deserve to exist, fighting alongside them, fighting my brain that tells me the same thing, feeling like there’s no relief, and it’s so hard, and i’m so tired, and we all are, and i’m so endlessly heartbroken to be hurting and feeling the hurt of everyone i hold inside my heart, but this morning i pulled dead blossoms off bundles of flowers so that new buds could open and i felt so grateful for my community and how strong it is and how resilient it is and how it tries its very best to take care of itself in any way it can, and i felt so grateful for myself and how strong i am and how resilient i am and how my big big heart wide wide open somehow finds a way to be bigger and wider every day despite everything that says it has no right to be. friends, anyone and everyone who reads this, whether i know you a lil or i know you a lot: i love you, actively, deeply, fiercely. it’s truly the only power and the only fight i have, it’s truly all i know how to do.
